Day 27: Coming Clean

October 3, 2021: Coming clean, what could I mean by that?

Well…

Right before I started Optavia, I also started…

Smoking (not marijuana as everyone assumes since I live in Colorado), but grape-flavored cigars.

Smoking is gross!

My smoking is not only gross, and unhealthy, but it has led to this:

My 5-yer-old granddaughter

My BrookieReign crying because she seen her Mimi smoking and now she is convinced I’m going to die and soon!

Did I mention I have Asthma? (Maybe she’s right, no I’m not making light of this.)

I know, I know, how stupid can I be?

How cruel is it to cause such a sweet baby to worry about my impending death date?

And, how knowing the health risks, the tears my actions have brought, still I am not ready to quit…not quite yet.

I know I could ask my Father to help me and He would, but I don’t want to quit!

I enjoy smoking, I love the taste of grape, I love the smoke breaks!

And smoking cigars isn’t as bad as smoking cigarettes!

Right?

Wrong:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/quit-smoking/expert-answers/cigar-smoking/faq-20057787

Dang it! I have mad respect for anything that the Mayo clinic puts out.

But, I don’t love being a bad role-model, nor putting something so unhealthy into my body!

Back and forth, the argument for quitting goes…

I needed to come clean, to write this post, so that all of you will hold me accountable.

It’s been difficult to write it, because I so want to wear the Mask of Justification!

If you missed the post about the Masks, you can catch up by clicking the link below:

https://personofhonor.com/weight-loss/september-30-2021-day-24-masks/

I could blame my smoking on my husband, after all, I quit for seven years while he still smoked.

But that would be the Mask of Blaming Others and I’m too strong of a person to take that easy way out.

I’d like to say I’m ready to quit. That would be responsible, God-honoring, and the right thing to do… but the best I can say right now is..

I will quit, but not until I’m ready to.

Today’s weigh in picture:

Total weight lost to date: 21 pounds!

I surpassed my 20 pound weight loss goal! Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Person of Honor

Hi! I'm Raynee. I am a Christian, a licensed professional counselor, a wife to a husband I do not deserve-cause he's so wonderful, a mother of two amazing adult children I couldn't be more proud of, and a grandmother AKA Mimi of seven absolutely adorable grandbabies. I am also an Optivia coach, a writer, a speaker, and most importantly (second to being a Christian that is) I am a woman of integrity and honor.

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